September 29,2004 - 11:58 p.m.
no matter how many times i hear beautiful, pretty,sexy, hot i want you i dont care things are broken the sky is falling down and here i am standing in an open field. he wonders why we had that time on the couch with hands up the shirts grabbing the ass licking the neck if everyday i will walk by him and not look twice. It is because a double take is not warranted... maybe i am playing them maybe i dont fucking care. All i want is someone to care about me and to touch me(even if not well) to tell me that they want a relationship and i will run away. they think i dont miss my first they think that im over it... well i am over it.. but i still miss him. Tonight when i told them all about the uncle that is dying lying in the hospital bleeding to death internally shocked because we didnt know it would happen we thought he was going to be ok i cant talk to the first my emotions would break free i would tell him everything i ever wanted to. Maybe not talking to him is hiding maybe i am afriad that he will listen but he wont care that he will hear my confession of undying love and it will be left unreciprocated. Maybe they are lining up but i am not taking numbers.
Oh simple thing where have you gone/I'm getting old and I need something to rely onSo tell me when you're gonna let me in/I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin/
\And if you have a minute why don't we go/Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything/So why don't we go/Somewhere only we know?/
Somewhere only we know?
Maybe before i thought that things were not going to end i thought i would be let in maybe i have almost given up maybe i hear someone elses hard breathing at night... maybe i can still see your name on my ceiling and stilll hear your heartbeat through my pillow. Perhaps i wonder why you left, perhaps i wonder what i dont have that you need.
Lindsey
somethings are better left unsaid, sometimes we are better off dead
