August 28, 2004 - 9:13 a.m.
A month is a long time. But I know we need it, we will come back and be able to talk about this with clear minds and open hearts. I dont know, maybe i want you to love me like i love you..... Maybe it hurts a little too much to think about my unrequited love. Never thought I would use that phrase when it came to us. I went to sleep last night, i looked at my ceiling and saw "I love Brian" written in glow in the dark paint... i almost cried... but i know we will be together again. Then i looked through the photo album you gave me for our first valentines day... i read the message you wrote... and i almost cried.... but then i didnt. I read the birthday card you gave me two months ago and i know you loved me. I have changed alot as a person within this week of us not seeing each other... I am going through some rough stuff right now.. trying to get everything in order for college. But it is fun, i think i have found myself and im not who i used to be. I havent been running around all the time trying to talk to everyone.... i found my real friends that i know will be there always, i reconnected with those than i lost that meant alot to me. Evan is going to teach me how to work on cars, it should be fun. And so far i am having a good time. But i dont know.... something is still missing.
Lindsey
