2004-10-11 - 6:43 p.m.
Well, i dont even know if anyone reads this anymore.. but i guess it doesnt really matter. I caught myself up online this morning at 1:00 saying goodnight to a boy that i dont really know.... today i went to see tonja and told her about brian and i, she could tell that i was about to come to tears and i said that i wanted to know that "goodbye" meant.. and she looked me straight in the eye and said: "lindsey, goodbye means it is over.. he doesnt want or need you anymore obviously.. he cut it off he is saying he doesnt want to be here anymore". I could feel every tear roll down my face, i didnt care anymore... how i looked. Then i changed the subject, and told her about david. He is coming back this friday, i am hoping he gets back in time to go to the pioneer leland game so that he can meet all my friends. He is really nice i am sure that they will like him. It was weird today no one knew anything everything is over they dont ask about him anymore after all it has been 6 weeks.
Today was weird, alot of people told me how pretty i looked perhaps it was the fact that i did my make up and straightened my hair and carried myself with a strange quiet confidence. I do not have confidence, but i guess it is attractive to have it. Well, i think i am going to go do my homework.. after all i guess i need to keep my grades up.
