2004-02-20 - 2:47 p.m.
My stomach hurts, oh well. Its dark again, i like it better than the blond streaks i dont know just more me. I look like my fathers daughter. Everything seems just a bit off this week. I miss my friends, but you know i think i needed this time away. My stomach still hurts. I bit my lip by accident and now it is kinda swollen, i cant leave it alone, it is another open wound. I dont resent anything, i dont i swear sometimes when i say that i dont think you hear. Sometimes when i say nothing you can hear everything. My pants are getting tighter, grrr. But still you tell me i am beautiful. one three seven and counting, how things can go down hill so fast i dont know. Maybe i am just dealing with somethings differently. Maybe i dont like being home alone. I know i dont because it really sucks to have no one to talk to it really sucks to gnaw on your lip for hours on end just wasting away the time. Today i did another workshop on self mutilation, it was interesting. Just to get to say what i want it was great i am so unafraid of public speaking now it is funny. You would be shocked how i act when put infront of 100 people. They gave me flowers and it felt good. It feels good to do what i have been doing. My lips are cracking and i am supposed to be working on the Ritter project but i am a little lost i am sure i am going to do it wrong because mine isnt creative at all. Maybe i dont want to be creative because i want to save time so when brian shows up i can be with him instead of doing homework. Yeah, i am sure i should have done this before right now. I wasted alot of time this week, oh well. I cant believe we only have 2 more days of our break i havent really done anything and have so much more to do . Oh well, I just wanted to put an entry in here before i got to work.
Lindsey
